Dear Me..

I'm stealing this idea from Busy Bee Lauren... who is hilarious. So don't think I'm all cool and came up with this myself. MMMkay?

Dear Me,

Remember that one time when you fainted at work? And then the next day it felt like your body had been trampled by the talons of a Tyrannosaurus Rex? Well hey. Don't do that anymore. Okay?

Love, Me.

Dear Me,

Remember that one time when you hadn't showered for almost 4 days AGAIN?? Hey, you should shower more. Just saying. And remember when you finally showered and you saw yourself naked for the first time in a while and your brain said to you, "You're not as hot as you used to be."? You should work on that. By not eating fatty foods so much.. and maybe moving once in a while... and not eating after 10 pm. Yeah. That would help.

Thanks, Me.

Dear Me,

Remember when you wanted to go on dates with boys? If you talk to boys that would help. And give you fun stories to blog about. Do it!

Obviously, Me.

Dear Me,

You should clean your room.

You're filthy, Me.

Dear Me,

You should start reading your scriptures every day again. It makes you happy! Don't you remember? Yeah, well you should. It's awesome. And it makes Jesus happy.

-Me.

Dear Words of Wisdom for the Day,

You are cool. People like you. Or so meself has been told. Keep up the good work. And for today you will be that sometimes it is so awesome to talk to yourself through letters.. to yourself. Which reminds me of a really really funny story that I will tell after I finish this letter.

Sincerely, Me.

This one time.. I was best friends with a girl named Brittany. And we both liked this boy named Justin. And when I say liked.. I mean we LOVED him.. and fought over him.. and tried to convince each other that he was really in love with MEEEE and not YOU! Stupid head. So this one time I had this brilliant idea that I was going to write a love letter.. from Justin.. to Me.. telling me of his undying love for me.. and that he wanted to run away together. JUST TO MAKE BRITTANY JEALOUS! So I wrote it. It was brilliant. Even at such a young age I just had a way with words. But then I was finished and there was irrigation outside.. so I decided to go make a beaver dam in the gutter with the overflowing water. I traveled down the street where the most water was.. gathering sticks and leaves to stop the flow.. when my Dad stuck his head out the door and hollered for me. WELL I wasn't finished playing yet, so I just pretended I didn't hear him. I didn't think much of it. ... until the next day at school. It was recess time and we were all running and frolicking about when I saw Justin at the drinking fountain. So of course I ran over to "get a drink" and say HELLO. But as soon as he saw me coming.. he ran away. And he just kept running away whenever I'd try to talk to him. I went home downtrodden and sorrowful. When my dad came home... all was revealed. My father had found the note I'd written the day before.. and tried to call me in to talk to me about it. But when I didn't come in HE CALLED JUSTIN'S DAD AND ASKED HIM ABOUT IT. Who then talked to Justin about it. Imagine my mortification. You can't. It's too much. Everything turned out okay though. Justin and I are still friends. Or we WERE until he abandoned me for a mission. It's cool, I'm proud of him. And he's awesome. And we even laughed about that a few times... not until about 9 years after it happened though. HA! Good times.

The end. :)